These days, I have been thinking about how we define ourselves and who we give permission to create us. As you should probably know by now, we are our creators. Yes, there is a higher power that we believe had created this Universe and everything there is, but we (I) also believe that higher power has given us free will. This means we can choose between different possible courses of action unimpeded. Otherwise, I don’t think anything would make sense. Why would we exist if somebody already predetermined our path? Who are we then? Puppets?

Somebody may say you are stupid, ugly, or unfit. There are two options you can choose to do: first, observe and let it go. Acknowledge this might be their opinion, but it doesn’t have to be yours; second, accept it as your truth and go through life firmly believing in it and letting it become part of your personality.

I remember I was in elementary school when my teacher told me I would not get any degree in my life. I accepted that. There was nobody out there to tell me not to believe in it. I mean, he was my teacher, and he probably knew what he was talking about. When you’re learning from authorities who you respect, you are even more inclined to conclude that the things they tell you are trustworthy. Later in my life, my dad argued with my mom about why she paid for my prep exam when I will never finish my studies. Guess what happened?

I spent years blaming it on them.

I was the one who had a choice. It took me sessions and healings to remove this belief. Once it gets rooted inside and you build your life on that foundation, it takes time to rebuild it. The only thing that is limiting you is you.

Today my daughter (5) came from her dance class crying. I asked her what happened. She said she wasn’t a superstar. She explained how one girl got to be a superstar because she followed everything their teacher told them to do, but she didn’t. Since I was already thinking about this subject, I was prepared to calm her down. I asked if she wanted to be a superstar, and she said yes. I said so be it.

“I can’t. She said I’m not.”

“Did I ever lie to you?”

“No.”

“I want you to turn on your listening ears now and listen to me very carefully. Your teacher or anybody else cannot define you. She can say you are a pig, but do you feel like a pig? No. She can say you are not a superstar, but you can go and look yourself in the mirror and say I am a superstar. Do you feel like a superstar?”

“NO.”

“Do you want to be a superstar?”

“No.”

“How does that make you feel? Happy or sad?”

“Happy.”

“So, who do you want to be?”

“Myself.”

BAM!!! I Just gave myself a supermom badge.

Sometimes we are not even aware of how and when we accept other people’s beliefs as ours.

Therefore, I came up with a list of things you can do in your daily life to identify limiting beliefs, thoughts, or ideas before they become part of you. Even if you have heard this, the question is do you apply it in your daily life.

1. Pay attention to your thoughts and self-talk. Please write it down. Write when you are feeling happy (up) and not feeling that way (feeling down). What we say to ourselves is who we are.
2. Reflect at the end of each day. Look back at what you could have done differently, not to judge yourself but to see how to improve your thoughts and actions. Pay attention to anything that had strongly influenced your day.
3. Be present. Reading a book or watching a video about being present will not change anything until you stop and do it right away. Like right now, are you present while reading this, or you already went to walk your dog or scroll through Instagram? I admit that just while I was writing this, I read something else because my mind started wandering around.
4. Also, some beliefs are unconscious. That’s where psychotherapy or ThetaHealing can help. In TH we use the tool we call to dig deeper. So we dig until we find it, and then we change it. It’s simple. Right?
5. Affirmations. Focus on those that speak to you. Not all affirmations apply to everybody. If you want them to help you, you should either write your own or find the one you can reflect on.
6. What is that you have always believed was true in your life, and it doesn’t work for you? Where did it come from? When was the first time you’ve heard it? Write it in a way it will work for you. Keep writing it every day until you believe it’s true. Find at least one piece of evidence to support your new belief. Believe in it.

While the world is full of different beliefs, we choose which one we accept to be part of us.